I have ordered two books on hoarding from Amazon...there is no way in hell I was going to walk into a store in my high heels, Yorkie in tow, to make that purchase! The clerk would probably assume that I had 40 more purse dogs stashed at home! In the meantime I have been doing internet research and participating on the Children of Hoarders message boards. I posted the question: Has anyone had success in helping their parent overcome hoarding and live a normal life? I have received about a dozen reply's at this point. Sadly most were not positive. However there was one that gave me some hope...this woman stated that her mother was not "cured", her home was messy but now livable. Note..this took several years to accomplish. I consider that to be a success and I can defiantly live with messy. Holy hell....I would be thrilled with messy!!! I just want mom to be safe at this point.
For the past few days I have been contemplating whether it would be most effective to confront her in person or write a letter. I think the letter is probably the best option. If I do it in person she will most likely blow up and refuse to discuss it. I'm pretty sure she would try to deflect back to me and start picking me apart. Fortunately I know there is nothing wrong with me so good luck with that! Just kidding ;-p In all seriousness I don't think it would even bother me that much. I know it is coming from a place of desperation. I think the most difficult part for me will be her denial of how dire the situation is. I'm getting really f***ing tired of hearing "everything is fine" and "It's my life". I just don't understand how she can not see how bad the mess is and how it affects others. Maybe the books will provide some insight into the thinking behind it?
I am currently trying to help my parents with their hoarding tendencies and I can't say it's easy. There is no way either of them would get rid of anything without my constant pushing. I am the one who is mainly removing everything from the house. I tried giving my mom self help books years ago, but she only procrastinated reading them and they ended up in a pile!
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